Reset

I folded. crumbled. tripped.
not necessarily by society's standards, but by my own.

fell flat on my face. halfway through.

From here on out- no shortcuts. no rationalizations. no excuses.
I'm going to finish this. 30 more.

Memorial Day

The sounds and smells of summer are here.
If I went to any other school, I'd be enjoying summer break already...

I have a beer, 25c wings, and Pearl Jam.
Cheers to a great day.

Missed Connection

I've remarked several times about "how cool it would be to have a missed connection".

Well, ladies and gentlemen, I think the day has arrived.
http://chicago.craigslist.org/chc/mis/685861022.html
The other girls who teach on Sunday are all blonde. I think that narrows it down quite a bit, right?

I'm not going to respond- because I'm honestly a little creeped out that this happened. It's so not fairytale-like.
But in general, it's still kinda cool...

laughter

I usually wouldn't put this up here.
but,
I laugh so hard every time I see this... oh man.
The facial reactions are ridiculous. I love it.

Sub-Par

Why did everything change?
I'm suddenly so not the person I used to be...

When did I become second best? I mean, really.
I've applied for six internships for this summer and haven't gotten a single one. Not only did I lose the guy, but I lost my awesomeness along the way. All of a sudden I'm cautious and second-guessing myself. This NEVER happens.

This isn't okay. I won't stand for it. This isn't how I do.
I play full out.
I will not settle for second best. I never settle.
I WILL have a rocking internship, I WILL have a rocking new guy, and I WILL have a good time. THAT'S how I do. I don't settle. I don't waste my time. I make things happen.

Time to take a break from the usual.
Time to start being a rockstar.

To the girl who sat next to me at Symphony Center:

What were you thinking?

It's people like you that make me want to change my major. People like you discourage my idea that audiences are accepting and willing.
I get that you were uncomfortable. Maybe this was one of the first Symphony experiences you've had. If so, let me clue you in on a few etiquette points:

1. Sit still.
I get that your right leg was probably falling asleep (don't cross your legs?), but that's no reason to thrash it about during a performance. Not only did you bump into me more than 10 times, but each time you audibly said "Sorry." Under normal circumstances, I would welcome this apology. However, when we're in a hall where the acoustics are tailored to hear a pin drop, your "Sorry" went all the way down to the lower balcony. Don't bother.

2. Breathe normally.
I get that you're a big girl and am giving you the benefit of the doubt on "breathing issues." However, your giant breaths every couple of minutes were more like sighs. Sighs of boredom, which was supplemented by tipping your head sideways. PLEASE STOP THIS. Sighing is contagious. People around you started to sigh. Also, the drama with which you sighed was quite unnecessary. While I understand that your brain might need more oxygen, there's no reason to gulp a breath like you haven't breathed for the last three minutes. That's obnoxious.

3. Read the program later.
Maybe you didn't understand the piece, maybe you didn't know how many movements it was... whatever. There was no reason for you to turn to your friend and discuss it in the middle of a piece. I heard every word you said- as did the surrounding 20 people. Save that for intermission.

4. LEAVE YOUR CELL PHONE ALONE.
I know- it's the curse of this generation. Connectivity. But really- if you cannot be disconnected from your cell phone for about 90 minutes, I think you need more than just help. The sheer fact that you kept checking your phone for the time during Rite of Spring was enough to irk me. The fact that you then proceeded to send texts, discuss them with your friends, and close/reopen the VELCRO POUCH on your purse set me over the edge. No doubt I would've punched you, were it socially acceptable. You managed to ruin most of the piece for me, which really sucks because I was psyched about it.

5. Ducking out early is rude.
Maybe you haven't heard, but clapping is common after a performance. It's a way to appreciate those who have just played. Your quick (and cumbersome) departure after the very moment the piece ended was rude. I know you were bored, but it only takes 2 minutes to clap and acknowledge those on stage. How would you like it if you performed and everyone, instead of clapping, turned around and booked it for the door? Awful? yeah, thought so.

Well, I suppose you're lucky to ducking out so quickly. I had all intentions of telling you off. Although the performing arts management side of me was saying, "She's part of the audience. Don't make her hesitant to return!" the musician side of me was so disgusted that I didn't want to ever see you at a Symphony concert again.

So there are your tips. Please take them to heart.
If I ever happen to sit near you at a concert in the future, I'd like to see a marked improvement.

Public Enemies

I am absolutely in love with what the crews are doing to Lincoln Ave. It looks and feels like you've stepped into the 1930s.

Apparently they're going to start filming this Friday. I saw them taking down streetlights today, so it's definitely soon. I also heard that they're closing the entire block for 3-4 days to film. How sweet would that be to skip class and just watching filming all afternoon? I may just do that...

I've been toying with what I want to do after graduation lately and, as of right now, I totally want to be a PA. How sweet would that be?!

--gimme a day or two to add pictures to this. I don't have a camera yet. (just for you Jessica!)

How to Make it as an Artist

"You've got to believe you have talent. Doesn't matter if the label thinks so, chances are they won't sign you and if they do, they can't break you.
If you're looking for some powerful person to wave his hand and say you're great, you're delusional.
If you believe in yourself enough to put you and your music out there, you'll continue to be able to play it if people want to hear it.
It's just that simple.
Doesn't matter whether it's good or bad, but whether you've got an audience. If you get an instant audience, great, you'll probably have a career. If not, chances are you suck, or if you don't suck, you're not making music most people want to hear. Don't cry in your beer, either give up, change your act or accept your fate, as a marginal artist." - Bob Lefsetz

Single

"People think if you're single, you are incomplete. No. The thing is, I don't want to be in a relationship that makes me incomplete." - Cameron Diaz

Migraine

I've been getting migraines for as long as I can remember. In elementary school, my mom would give me ibuprofen and have me sleep it away. It used to work pretty well...

But, over the past 2 years, they've been getting more intense. Intense like wearing sunglasses and ear plugs around my apartment just to get things done. Oh yeah, and now when I get one I feel nauseous too. AWESOME. The worst part is- I can't sleep them away anymore. They're still there in full form when I wake up in the morning.

I sorta want to try a prescription for it, but a lot of them have wicked side effects (feeling like your body is being crushed?!) and don't always work. oy.

I'm getting better at identifying triggers for my migraines, so that has helped to reduce them. But, one of my triggers is working out without doing an obscenely long cool down (until my heart rate is under 135)... and I'm not about to change the intensity of my workout....

Any ideas?

Liz Lemon

I used to watch Friends and Sex and the City religiously. I was a Rachel and a Carrie. But, for some reason, neither of those roles really defined me. I wasn't really that similar to either of those characters.

- Enter Liz Lemon -

I'm convinced that 30 Rock is the greatest show of all time. I literally cannot stop watching it. It's 2:49am, and I have 5 more episodes left in the first season. They will all be completed before my head hits the pillow tonight.

Liz Lemon is sorta based on Tina Fey's life. She's quirky, eccentric, occasionally irrational, hilarious, loves food, and will do anything for her staff. Either I really want to be her or I sort've already am.

Here's a Wikipedia link on Liz Lemon.

Oh, and start watching 30 Rock. You won't regret it. The only thing you won't like is your roommates reactions when you wake them up by laughing loudly at 2:49am. (whoops)

Productivity

All productivity has stopped.

I've literally been watching 30 Rock, searching Craigslist for weird/odd/hilarious things, and drinking too much wine for 3 days straight. I've gotten absolutely nothing accomplished.

To top it off, I just discovered that I can add Craigslist RSS feeds to my Google homepage.

aaaaaand sayonara to all things I would've accomplished this week...

keeping it classy

I feel as though I've been through trial by fire twice in the past two weeks.
I'm happy to report, that after six whiskey sours, I am still still able to keep composure and keep things classy.

Maybe that's the point?
Maybe life isn't about being comfortable in every situation, but making the best of it and rolling with the punches...

People change; life goes on.
Sometimes it takes a deep breath and a strong drink, but really...living is what counts, and I'm going to make the best of it.

Innately Good

I truly believe that people, if given a chance, are good by nature.
Stories like this make me think I'm right...
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/07/nyregion/07violin.html?_r=1&partner=rssnyt&emc=rss&oref=slogin

Why I want to work in marketing/public relations

I love the sheer idea of creating something to inspire someone else.
Is there really anything better than that?